MORE POWERFUL THAN YOU COULD POSSIBLY IMAGINE

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     Is he going to touch my face?  General rules of personal space probably aren’t applicable at the moment.  It’s the grey in my beard.  Like jingling car keys or blinking holiday lights, the beard has seized his attention.

     “Obi Wan,” he whispers as if he has been searching the galaxy and has finally found me.  And yes, he is lightly touching my face.  True, the original Obi Wan was three decades older than myself so the comparison stings a bit.  But, I mean it is Obi Freaking Wan Kenobi.  A true bad-ass of the universe teaming with understated wisdom and some set of Uber ninja skills.  It’s a fair trade to be seen as a man pushing eighty. 

     This is Enrique.  Big man on campus.  Large and likable.  Infectious crooked smile and big belly laugh.  He is a special needs student, perhaps more gifted than lacking however there is clearly a large disconnect between him and the rigors of reading and writing.  But Enrique has much more to offer.  There is an instant and natural joy you get by being around him.  Joy is its own art form and if you can give it away like penny candy to the masses, that is a skill set not to take lightly or dismiss.  What the world needs now, am I right?

     And for Enrique, for the unique in general, the campus has a Statue-of-Liberty-vibe to it.  Old school Statue of Liberty, not the new one with all the unspoken addendums and asterisks added to it.   If you’re different, if you’re quirky, if you’re sitting out on the fringes a bit, enough kids here will have your back.  Enrique strides through the halls, flag fully flying.

     So now, our keeper of the joy has granted me with a new nickname.  Obi Wan.  I’ve been called far worse by people who were far less, so I will own this one for sure.  But Enrique wants me to earn it.  And a new pattern has taken hold.  He is a man most at ease in the comfort of a reliable pattern.  So, he feels entitled to kill me with the force at least twice a day.  One death in the morning, and one at lunch.  I saw him once after school and he waved.

     “Not now, Obi Wan,” he said to me in earnest.  The next morning though, he whips his big hand into the air as if he about to palm my face.  It is his outpouring of the force.  I reel back on my heels a bit, then slump forward.  The first time this goes down, he looks annoyed.

     “What’s the matter, Enrique?”

     “You do it all wrong,” he said almost embarrassed for me.  “Kill me and I’ll show you.”   So, I thrust my palm into the air and Enrique flails his arms.  He shakes like a cartoon character being electrocuted.  Then, exhausted, he lets his upper body dangle down slightly swaying from the volt.  I make some mental notes and motion for Enrique to force me again.  This time I throw myself into the role.  I let my upper body dangle an extra second or two making it a great shot for the close-up.  Enrique beams.  Clearly, I’ve nailed it.  And it builds.

     And Enrique has worked his joy-mojo on me.  I claim to do this for him, but I am clearly all in.  I notice that I scout him out in the morning rush.  I go on Youtube and look up Kenobi’s classic last line when Vader takes him out.  After a few run-throughs, I use it one morning.

     “If you strike me down, I shall become more powerful than you could possibly imagine.”  Enrique is thrilled.  Sure, it’s off script, but I think he finds my acting choices bold.

     Joy.  It gives him immense pleasure, and it does about the same for me.  It’s all just an excuse to express some joy.  And it takes precedence over all other conversations.  In mid conversation with other teachers I stop, deliver my line, die, and return to the conversation.  Some ask.  Some don’t.

     The mad genius that is Enrique.  It can be found deep down along the soft underbelly of it all, where the knowledge is kept about how all of our acts are just symbols.  Symbols of joy.  Symbols of love.  Symbols of fear.  We just move through our symbols.  Enrique knows it so well, he has no idea that this is something that is not to be known by most.  The kid just may be the sound of one hand clapping.  No joke.

     About a month or so into it, he walks in to my room to collect the bottles to be recycled.  When he realizes it is my room and sees me standing at the front, he whispers in glee.

      “Obi Wan.”

     “If you strike me down, I shall become more powerful than you could possibly imagine.”  The force rocks me back on my heels, the upper body dangles.  He smiles, waves, then leaves.  I get back to the lesson at hand.  Most kids are baffled.

     “What was that?” a kid asks.  After a full explanation, a grand plan is hatched.  Everyone wants in.  The class rehearses a few times during the week.  Many of the kids are not nailing the Alec Guiness accent, and it’s a little frustrating.  Next Friday comes, Enrique walks in.  Smiles don’t get much better than his.

     “Obi Wan” he whispers.  In unison, the class delivers the line.

     “If you strike me down, I shall become more powerful than you could possibly imagine.”  Enrique is mesmerized.  He briefly jumps up and down.  This is just too good.  He hurls what can best be described as a super-sized version of the force at the room.  His arm quivers.  If he held it any longer, he would have surely broken out in a sweat.  A room of thirty-two feel the force suck the very life from their eternal souls and they collapse.  It is a little like a flash mob, I guess.

     And the boy, who somehow dwells in the sweetest of spots, somewhere between toddler simplicity and old-sage-wisdom, conforming to no one’s expectations ever, goes full toddler.  He giggles and hops up and down.

     Any effort to define the force by a person with only some cursory knowledge of the movies, would be nothing short of blasphemy.  But still, must-attempt-I.  Just maybe Enrique’s obsession is really about all he knows but cannot say.  The ability to instantly stream joy into a greying world.  The sweetest of smiles dipped with audacity into the infinite gloom.  The true force.  Who knows?  But Enrique has a special gift that cannot be denied.  And it can invisibly grab hold of you from clear across a room, with more power than you could possibly imagine.

 

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