Tuesday, February 10, 2015

WHEN THEY CAME FOR ME









     Something to think about here.  Nothing scientific.  I don’t come armed with the latest data or statistics.  It’s just based on my own observations.  But it has stuck out time and time again. When I first started teaching middle school, there was something I noticed right away about the boys.  It was immediate.  Most of the boys spent a lot of their energy each day doing one of two things.  First, they were usually accusing some other boy of being gay.  If they weren’t, it was only because they were too busy vehemently denying that they were gay based on a recent accusation.  Used to.  It is no longer the trend.
     In a fairly short span of time, the climate has changed.  The general public has become far more accepting of the gay community.  Schools call out kids that use the word as a slur.  As it should.  And, it’s worked.  Stories of gay adolescents tragically taking their own lives have been broadcasted in a big way.  As horrific as these stories have been, the impact has been profound.  Things have changed.  And maybe the tortured broken parents of these dead children might find some small solace in the fact that they did not die in vain.  The cause was heard.  It resonated and many chose to pick up the torch.  Civil rights workers lost for greater good.
     So “you're-gay-no-you're-gay” scenarios almost rarely play out anymore.  Good.  Great, right?  Of course.  But, in some ways, nothing has changed.  The same gay-haters still torment other boys.  Actually, they torment the same boys.  It’s just no longer about the sexuality.  Maybe they were never really after sexuality in the first place.  All the punching and taunting and teasing and public humiliations perhaps did not have sexual preference as their prime objective.  Maybe gay just made for the easiest targets.  For generations, “gay” and all of its stereotypes was the acceptable target for funneling and fueling hatred.
     Maybe the real target was something else.  Maybe the real target was our emotions; the ability to live an emotional life.  The ability to cry.  The ability to empathize.  The ability to love.  The tear-less and the heartless have been looking down, circling the emotional and those frail beautiful hearts; frail beautiful hearts like rainforests or anything else precious that we tend to destroy. 
     All of us with a good heart, with a deep sense of empathy, and an eye for that one detail in a work of art that enables the heart to flourish, should watch our backs.  We owe the gay community a vast debt of gratitude.  They have been carrying the burden of our hearts for far too long.  They were our shields of sorts.  “I did not speak up when they came for the ____________, because I was not a __________________.”  Fill in the blank.  Fill in the blank and turn an ignorant eye until your world becomes uncomfortably small with fewer and fewer ideas and choices and preferences and opportunities to be uniquely human.  Maybe the blank has already been filled.  Maybe the Tin Man and the forlorn poet in all of us is up next.

 
If you're enjoying the blog, here's a book I recommend. "Our Kids: Building Relationships in the Classroom," is available at Amazon.
 
 
 
 

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